So part II of the wedding story….I’ll try to just hit the highlights.
The toast: OMG, I was so nervous. The whole night I was just wondering when exactly they would take place. If you remember from last time, I hardly had the opportunity to write something. I had a few words on the hotel notepad folded up in my purse. So I have a shot of vodka right before the reception starts. Hmmmm, not strong enough. Let’s go with some wine. Better. Now how about some champagne. Yum! My stomach was saying ‘WTF are you DOING?’ I said ‘shut the hell up stomach’. SO finally the time came. The DJ announced “now it’s time for the all-important toasts! I need the Best Man to come out to the dance floor!” My heart at this point starts thumping like I’m having a heart attack. I could hear my heart in my ears. I felt light headed. I think I started to sweat. The Best Man gave his toast in the middle of the dance floor, spotlight on him while Heather and Tim looked on from the side of the dance floor. His toast was short and sweet and talked about how Tim got him drunk when he was a kid. I don’t’ really remember all the details, I was playing the game of ‘freak the fuck out’ in my head. Finally my time came. I was thinking that maybe, just maybe they would forget about me, but apparently not. So I sauntered up to the dance floor and started. I mentioned that I had already told 75% of the people attending that I was nervous, so I’ll start by letting the other 25% know. The funny thing was my voice was calm and clear and loud and I was able to continuously look around the room while speaking. What people didn’t see was that my hands were shaking terribly. In fact, at one point I wanted to look at my notes. I looked down and it was like I was sitting on one of those vibrating beds (or so I imagine ::wink wink:: ) my hand was shaking so hard I couldn’t read a damn thing I wrote. SO I said ‘eff it’ and just continued on. I think I missed a few points in there, but I did avoid saying that I was wearing crotch less panties. Whew! Mom and Dad would have been proud of that one!
So I finished, raised my glass and toasted the new couple. Then I promptly walked off the dance floor. Heather got my attention and looked at me like a loon while mentioning me to come over. I looked at her like ‘huh?’ Okay DUH, I didn’t even go over and hug them after I was done. I was just so relieved that I had finished and not peed my pants that I was scurrying over to my vodka and 7-up. Oh well, I can’t be totally perfect. Ha ha!
After that I was able to loosen up a bit…okay a LOT. I hit up Heather’s Aunt to put in a good word for me with CT. If course, the last time I saw Heather’s Aunt it was when Heather and I were like 16 and were on a trip with her family floating the Guadalupe River in New Braunsfuls. And getting drunk. Flirting for beers. Oh, and I lost my top that trip as well. NOT on purpose. I swear. Anyway, it had been a while, but I was sure she remembered me as a fun girl. She asked who my competition was and I pointed them out. She promptly called them bitches and said she’s get him for me. Ha ha! I was really kinda kidding so when I saw her later talking to CT one on one I was slightly mortified. BUT it was enough to get him out on the dance floor. At that point I was a little tipsy so Lisa, Mindy and I started to dance with him. At one point it was just he and I and he asked if I wanted a drink. ::Megan swoons:: Yes, thank you. And off he goes. At which point I’m frantically looking for the other girls so I can brag, and try not to choke, and try not to tell him I don’t swallow. ::smacks forehead:: I try to act as cool as I can (which is not very) and wander off every once in a while to go talk to others, dance with other people, etc. and not follow this poor guy around. But, then there were times when he twirled me around on the dance floor and I giggled like I was 12. It was so much fun.
Speaking of dancing I saw something at the wedding I NEVER thought I would see. EVER. My father got out on the dance floor and was dancing. To Michael Jackson, to House of Pain, to I don’t even remember who else, but this man who I’ve known for almost 31 years got out on the dance floor and shook his butt. My sister and I were a mix of shocked and mortified. We couldn’t believe it. In fact, he worked up such a sweat that he left to cool off and missed my toast! Crazy crazy crazy. My father does not like weddings. He does not like loud music. He does not like rap. Yet he was dancing to all of it. It was greatness.
Anyhow, towards the end of the night we were all chomping at the bit to go up to the hospitality suite. It was AWESOME. Like a house. IT had black hardwoods, a zebra rug, a kitchen, pool table, living room with flat panel tv, HUGE patio (on the 10th floor), big bedroom, an office. It was amazing. Heather’s brother bought a bazillion tamales and invited everyone back (well, the ‘kids’ at least). The place was hoppin. Lisa and I were stuck to CT like glue for the night, particularly since he really didn’t know anyone (yeah, yeah, THAT was the reason). Did I mention Lisa’s boyfriend was there? Yeah, and at one point she was sitting on him lap…he asked if she was there with her boyfriend and I looked at her and she looked at me and I said, ‘no that’s her cousin’. OMG, why exactly am I helping her cause? Ha ha! Anyway, Lisa’s boyfriend came by about that time and peeled Lisa off CT. Nice. Anyhow, the rest of the night we spent talking to him. I asked where he lived at one point. He said uptown (we were downtown). I mentioned that that was a far way to walk home (since he was drunk). He said it wasn’t that far and that I could walk home with him. Uhhhhh, I’m such a dork that I said ‘then how would I get back?’ ::smacks forehead harder:: Don’t get me wrong, I wouldn’t have actually gone home with him or anything (even though I had proclaimed to all the girls the night before that I’d totally sleep with him on the first night…ya know…for humor sake). But when it comes down to brass tacks I’m such a wuss. Obviously. Anyway, everyone slowly left and my sister and I ended up just about closing down the joint. CT was still there. It was like 3:30 in the morning. I asked how he was getting home. He said he was going to try to get a cab (do they run that late at night??) I said if he didn’t get a cab he could stay with my sister and I at the hotel. She whipped her head around and gave me the crazy look. Yeah, I don’t know what the hell I was saying “hi, come stay with my sister and I….I have these cute polka dot pajama pants that I want you to see.” Really, I knew he wouldn’t take me up on the offer, but I thought I would extend Southern hospitality. No number exchanging, and I doubt I’ll ever see him again, but it was totally fun to flirt and dance and get drunk.
The next morning was brunch. I was a bit green around the gills, but Andrea (my sister) and I made our way to the French Room for a fantabulous brunch hosted by Tim’s parents. Yum yum! Great way to start the day and great way to end the wedding weekend.
So that’s my story, hope you didn’t fall asleep. I’m laughing to myself here in class as I’m writing it. Here are a few more pictures for you. There MAY or MAY not be a picture of Cousin Trey in these pics. I’m just sayin... Lisa is with me in the first pic and that's Mindy in the blury pic with the unidentified gentleman.
The toast: OMG, I was so nervous. The whole night I was just wondering when exactly they would take place. If you remember from last time, I hardly had the opportunity to write something. I had a few words on the hotel notepad folded up in my purse. So I have a shot of vodka right before the reception starts. Hmmmm, not strong enough. Let’s go with some wine. Better. Now how about some champagne. Yum! My stomach was saying ‘WTF are you DOING?’ I said ‘shut the hell up stomach’. SO finally the time came. The DJ announced “now it’s time for the all-important toasts! I need the Best Man to come out to the dance floor!” My heart at this point starts thumping like I’m having a heart attack. I could hear my heart in my ears. I felt light headed. I think I started to sweat. The Best Man gave his toast in the middle of the dance floor, spotlight on him while Heather and Tim looked on from the side of the dance floor. His toast was short and sweet and talked about how Tim got him drunk when he was a kid. I don’t’ really remember all the details, I was playing the game of ‘freak the fuck out’ in my head. Finally my time came. I was thinking that maybe, just maybe they would forget about me, but apparently not. So I sauntered up to the dance floor and started. I mentioned that I had already told 75% of the people attending that I was nervous, so I’ll start by letting the other 25% know. The funny thing was my voice was calm and clear and loud and I was able to continuously look around the room while speaking. What people didn’t see was that my hands were shaking terribly. In fact, at one point I wanted to look at my notes. I looked down and it was like I was sitting on one of those vibrating beds (or so I imagine ::wink wink:: ) my hand was shaking so hard I couldn’t read a damn thing I wrote. SO I said ‘eff it’ and just continued on. I think I missed a few points in there, but I did avoid saying that I was wearing crotch less panties. Whew! Mom and Dad would have been proud of that one!
So I finished, raised my glass and toasted the new couple. Then I promptly walked off the dance floor. Heather got my attention and looked at me like a loon while mentioning me to come over. I looked at her like ‘huh?’ Okay DUH, I didn’t even go over and hug them after I was done. I was just so relieved that I had finished and not peed my pants that I was scurrying over to my vodka and 7-up. Oh well, I can’t be totally perfect. Ha ha!
After that I was able to loosen up a bit…okay a LOT. I hit up Heather’s Aunt to put in a good word for me with CT. If course, the last time I saw Heather’s Aunt it was when Heather and I were like 16 and were on a trip with her family floating the Guadalupe River in New Braunsfuls. And getting drunk. Flirting for beers. Oh, and I lost my top that trip as well. NOT on purpose. I swear. Anyway, it had been a while, but I was sure she remembered me as a fun girl. She asked who my competition was and I pointed them out. She promptly called them bitches and said she’s get him for me. Ha ha! I was really kinda kidding so when I saw her later talking to CT one on one I was slightly mortified. BUT it was enough to get him out on the dance floor. At that point I was a little tipsy so Lisa, Mindy and I started to dance with him. At one point it was just he and I and he asked if I wanted a drink. ::Megan swoons:: Yes, thank you. And off he goes. At which point I’m frantically looking for the other girls so I can brag, and try not to choke, and try not to tell him I don’t swallow. ::smacks forehead:: I try to act as cool as I can (which is not very) and wander off every once in a while to go talk to others, dance with other people, etc. and not follow this poor guy around. But, then there were times when he twirled me around on the dance floor and I giggled like I was 12. It was so much fun.
Speaking of dancing I saw something at the wedding I NEVER thought I would see. EVER. My father got out on the dance floor and was dancing. To Michael Jackson, to House of Pain, to I don’t even remember who else, but this man who I’ve known for almost 31 years got out on the dance floor and shook his butt. My sister and I were a mix of shocked and mortified. We couldn’t believe it. In fact, he worked up such a sweat that he left to cool off and missed my toast! Crazy crazy crazy. My father does not like weddings. He does not like loud music. He does not like rap. Yet he was dancing to all of it. It was greatness.
Anyhow, towards the end of the night we were all chomping at the bit to go up to the hospitality suite. It was AWESOME. Like a house. IT had black hardwoods, a zebra rug, a kitchen, pool table, living room with flat panel tv, HUGE patio (on the 10th floor), big bedroom, an office. It was amazing. Heather’s brother bought a bazillion tamales and invited everyone back (well, the ‘kids’ at least). The place was hoppin. Lisa and I were stuck to CT like glue for the night, particularly since he really didn’t know anyone (yeah, yeah, THAT was the reason). Did I mention Lisa’s boyfriend was there? Yeah, and at one point she was sitting on him lap…he asked if she was there with her boyfriend and I looked at her and she looked at me and I said, ‘no that’s her cousin’. OMG, why exactly am I helping her cause? Ha ha! Anyway, Lisa’s boyfriend came by about that time and peeled Lisa off CT. Nice. Anyhow, the rest of the night we spent talking to him. I asked where he lived at one point. He said uptown (we were downtown). I mentioned that that was a far way to walk home (since he was drunk). He said it wasn’t that far and that I could walk home with him. Uhhhhh, I’m such a dork that I said ‘then how would I get back?’ ::smacks forehead harder:: Don’t get me wrong, I wouldn’t have actually gone home with him or anything (even though I had proclaimed to all the girls the night before that I’d totally sleep with him on the first night…ya know…for humor sake). But when it comes down to brass tacks I’m such a wuss. Obviously. Anyway, everyone slowly left and my sister and I ended up just about closing down the joint. CT was still there. It was like 3:30 in the morning. I asked how he was getting home. He said he was going to try to get a cab (do they run that late at night??) I said if he didn’t get a cab he could stay with my sister and I at the hotel. She whipped her head around and gave me the crazy look. Yeah, I don’t know what the hell I was saying “hi, come stay with my sister and I….I have these cute polka dot pajama pants that I want you to see.” Really, I knew he wouldn’t take me up on the offer, but I thought I would extend Southern hospitality. No number exchanging, and I doubt I’ll ever see him again, but it was totally fun to flirt and dance and get drunk.
The next morning was brunch. I was a bit green around the gills, but Andrea (my sister) and I made our way to the French Room for a fantabulous brunch hosted by Tim’s parents. Yum yum! Great way to start the day and great way to end the wedding weekend.
So that’s my story, hope you didn’t fall asleep. I’m laughing to myself here in class as I’m writing it. Here are a few more pictures for you. There MAY or MAY not be a picture of Cousin Trey in these pics. I’m just sayin... Lisa is with me in the first pic and that's Mindy in the blury pic with the unidentified gentleman.
This may be my favorite pic of the night...it sums up the evening perfectly...we're a hot mess.
Champagne wishes and lots of champagne toast dreams...
2 comments:
Does Cousin Trey like red ties?
Like Christmas trey?
:)
Merry Christmas Megan!
Great story! You big flirt.
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